AN OPEN LETTER TO MY LIBIDO: (A brown Yogini’s Experience with Brahmacharya aka Yogic Celibacy) by Misia Denéa
AN OPEN LETTER TO MY LIBIDO ( A Brown Yogini’s Experience with Brahmacharya aka Yogic Celibacy)
“Celibacy is considered to a Yogi to be what electricity is to an electric bulb. Without celibacy no spiritual progress is thought to be possible. It is seen as a potent weapon and shield to wage war against the internal evils of lust, anger and greed”- Swami Sivananda
I hope this note finds you doing well!
So its been a little over 5 months since I have vowed to take a one year break from sexual intercourse. I have been very successful. Its been somewhat easier than I thought it would be.
Moving from Washington D.C. to Oakland, CA in September 2012 has been quite an experience.
A few months before I left D.C I made the decision to commit to celibacy. Libido, you have been handling this well.
Libido, I do love you I am just treading a path of non-attachment. I feel like I was using you to cling to certain situations that turned out to be, quite honestly, cheap thrills and passing pleasures. I respect folks who go to 12-step programs to remove their fixation on a compulsive behavior or addiction. As you and I both know Libido, whenever I needed to avoid my own turbulent emotions and fickle mind chatter, I would reach over to you to numb my inner turmoil sometimes,I would reach over to you the way folks reach for a box of sweets, a stiff drink or a starry pill. Certain things can quiet the dissonance inside , but only temporarily. Thats why I want to be celibate for at least a year , to really prove to myself that I don’t have to look toward romance or casual encounters to fulfill my heart’s deepest desire.
My yoga and meditation practice has taught me to seek experiences that are full of embodiment versus self-destruction. Brahmacharya ( yogic celibacy)is one of the tenets certain yogis , for thousands of years , have adapted to assist spiritual awakening. To quote one of the senior teachers at Kripalu , Richard Faulds,”Celibacy really helps people heal and become physically vibrant, and it also shows you all of your dependencies,” Faulds says. “We’ve found if people practice celibacy for a year or so, they really strengthen their sense of self.”
So Libido I am not throwing the baby out with the bathwater by practicing celibacy. I am merely finding clever ways to use sexual energy, I have deepened my yoga and meditation practice since I have claimed my celibacy.
Libido, please understand me when I say , it’s me … not you. I will still be connected with you , but in a less carnal way. Instead of perpetually looking for romance or friends with benefits. I will channel my sexual energy into , yoga, meditation , creative endeavours and soul searching. Since I am focused on being less distracted by sex I have even decided to be selective about the movies I watch and only listening to certain music. I have enjoyed reading about celibacy I have read several books on the topic that have really been helpful and informative. Libido, celibacy has helped me listen and bring my attention inward, it has helped me focus and become more grounded. I’ll leave you with a quote from A woman named Judith Lasater has explained that,her statement sums up my celibacy experience ( thus far ).”Brahmacharya is not an answer; it’s a question,” Lasater adds. “And the question is, How will I use my sexuality in a way that honors my divinity and the divinity of others?”
“Love one another,
but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between
the shores of your souls.”
— Khalil Gibran (Love Letters in the Sand: The Love Poems of Khalil Gibran) http://ow.ly/i/1pKDa
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